As I like to remind my clients who are disappointed that they are late bloomers and lagging behind others, at least you are blooming, not everyone does.
I know that healing is hard and there is a natural grief, sadness and anger that can arise around that process and around how much time has been missed.
Those feelings are completely valid.
And, it is also true that you are blooming now, when not everyone figures it out. It is worth celebrating that you are healing now.
I have seen it, I have lived it, I have worked with this in my practice. My clients have taught me….
That it is never too late to realize who you truly are. It doesn’t matter if you figure out your gender identity in middle age, or even old age after having a family, you still have time to live and love as your authentic self. You are blooming into who you’ve always been and that is beautiful.
That you can realize at any age that you experienced attachment trauma and emotional neglect from your family, even if your family looks ‘normal,’ even if you don’t realize until your 50s. You still have time to work through those experiences and learn to step into your power and live life on your terms. You are blooming into the person you were meant to be.
That you can be in your 40s and fully realizing how the systems of white supremacy, patriarchy and capitalism have really impacted and harmed you as a person of color, and that you deserve better and that the way society or our culture sees you does not actually define your worth. You can grow and bloom in ways that the dominant culture does not recognize, but that is blooming just the same.
That you can be a new mom, and finally facing and healing the relationship you have with your body, your sexuality, and your mother. You are blooming into the woman you were always meant to be. Your blooming helps prevent the passing along of intergenerational trauma and allows your children and family to bloom along with you.
You are blooming, and that is beautifu!