@TraumaTherapySD

  • Lyrics from Elton John

    We have such a habit of trying to get away from unpleasant or negative moods in our culture.

    We desperately try to escape denial, throwing ourselves into projects, travel, medication, drugs, shopping, sex, and on and on.

    But these negative emotions are important and need to be felt, otherwise they will be stored and built up until there is a problem.

    Sadness tells us we have lost something that was important to us. The loss needs to be acknowledged and felt. This might mean taking the time to cry, to mourn and grieve.  If we fight against this feeling, we are actually adding energy to the emotion and will cause it to remain around longer or intensify.

    Sadness maybe a sign that we need to review what happened and how to deal with it or prevent it in the future, or adjust to the reality of the loss. If we avoid doing this review, then we may set ourselves up for future loss, or we set ourselves up to not cope with it well.

    Sadness can also signal a need for help or comfort. If we deny this feeling, then we are less likely to reach out for support or accept it when offered.

    Allowing yourself the space to feel sadness and other emotions allows them to naturally flow in and then back out. This does not mean you need to sit and wallow and stay in that emotion, but you do need to feel it. 

    Allowing yourself to feel the feelings also allows you to see that they will come and go, they will not last forever and this can build your resilience and confidence in yourself.