Parts work – communication
As previously posted, these are the 5 C’s that guide my work with parts: curiosity, compassion, communication, consent and cooperation.
Today I want to talk about the element of communication. This applies to both my communication with a client/part and communication within the system, between parts.
Everything that I say to the client, or a particular part, I am willing for all parts to hear or know. I do not believe in secrets or taking sides. My priority is my client is the person and system as a whole.
As a therapist working with parts, it is really important to learn to listen for what is not being said, what is being avoided, and what parts or perspectives are being expressed quietly. I need to be listening for hesitation, because the only way that work can proceed safely is at the pace of the slowest part of the system.
As for communication among parts, within the system, this will be paramount to healing and becoming more functional in life.
Communication comes in many forms, this might be actual verbal communication within the headspace, or it might be a physical symptom within the body. Part of healing is learning to listen to all the ways that parts communicate.
Oftentimes this communication starts solely in the therapy room as this is where the person feels safest to do so. Over time, communication becomes more frequent and easier in the person’s day to day life.
This may look different for different people and systems. For some clients it’s on-going, real-time communication within the headspace. Sometimes it’s keeping a journal and communicating that way, others use apps. There is no one right way to do this.
