Queering EMDR

Currently reading the book Queering EMDR therapy, edited by Roshni Chabra, LMFT and there are some really great chapters and perspectives. This quote is from the chapter by Steven Halady, PhD, LCSW on Healing Relationships: Queer Trauma and the Power of Love.

“And that’s the thing that my journeys through my queerness, philosophy, trauma, and healing have taught me about love: it isn’t love if it doesn’t include the ugly bits, the warts and scars and broken pieces that we shame away from the world. Love requires the courage to put aside our fixing reflex so we can draw out and embrace what is most painful in those we love – including ourselves. We do this not to lessen the pain, but to experience it just as it is, accepting it with no agenda for or against it.”

It think this is such an important and powerful reminder in Pride month, about the power of love in action.

It also reminds us that one of the single most important aspects of healing is the relationship and a powerful part of that healing relationship is the therapist’s ability to hold and accept all the jagged, ugly, mean, dark parts of a person.