Quote by Alan Watts
It has always fascinated me how very attached we get to who we think we are, no matter how negative. Who we think we are frames the stories we tell ourselves about what we do and how we feel. The way that we see ourselves is shaped to a large degree to the families and cultures we are raised in. When there are healthy attachment figures and development proceeds as normal, then kids learn to have relatively positive images of themselves and what they are able to accomplish in the world. However, when there is abuse, neglect, chaos or other developmental traumas, kids learn more negative things about themselves. They can learn that they are unworthy or unlovable. And if the kid identifies as part of the LGBTQIA+ community, this negative message about who they are can be compounded, particularly if the family rejects them. Therefore, in therapy a significant task is often to help people to let go of who they think they are, to accept the reality of who they are and what they need in life. This can be incredibly scary for a time. But the folks that I work with usually have amazing qualities and abilities. Once they are able to let go of the image of who they think they are or should be, then an awakening happens. Then they are able to really start exploring who they are and what they are capable of.