We all experience stress and we all blame it on something, and to some degree this is true. But it is also very true that the stress comes from how we respond. And I would also argue that it is our thoughts, our feelings and the meaning we assign to these circumstances that can increase or decrease our stress.
If the way a person thinks about a situation is with the use of cognitive distortions, overgeneralizing or all-or-nothing thinking, this can increase the stress about a situation.
If a person believes that the reason that their partner comes home late is because they were out meeting another person is likely to increase their sense of stress. Whereas if they believe the reason is due to their partner had to finish a project for work, the stress is not likely to be as high.
This is just another friendly reminder that the way we react and respond to things has a huge impact on how we feel, and that we can take an active role in reducing our own stress response by the way we handle things.
If you have grown up in a toxic, dysfunctional or abusive household then you may have learned maladaptive ways to handle stress, to view others, the world or yourself and the meaning you ascribe to actions and situations. However, these adaptations are often no longer useful and in need of updating for the current situation in which you find yourself.