Quote by Carl Rogers

I believe this is such a good quote. It encompasses so much about the paradox of trauma work, and really of most therapy work.

Trans and non-binary folx often come into therapy with some dysphoria and some internalized negative messages about their gender, their identity, or their body.  When these things are present, they make life and functioning harder, and unpleasant, so of course they want to change it.

And yet their gender identity is valid, however, incongruent with their body. And they are enough and worthy, just as they are. And their bodies have carried them through their toughest times and helped them get to a place where they can sit down in front of me.

People who have been traumatized and finally come into therapy desperately want help to change how their brain and body react to life and triggers. This makes so much sense!

And yet, we must also help them to learn to accept who they are, right now. That they are worthy of love and care, right now as they are. We want to help them understand that there are really good, valid reasons that they are acting, thinking, or feeling the way that they do. And that this can change for the better.