Quote by Debra Wasselan

In working with people who grew up in homes that where chaotic, toxic, abusive or neglectful this is something that comes up a lot.

For some clients, they knew that they were living with damaged people, in messed up environments, and were eager to get out. Yet after they have gotten out, they still carry around the negative beliefs about themselves that they learned at home.

This is because kids take in what the ‘adults’ in their environment tell them or show them about themselves. Many times, these kids don’t even realize they’ve internalized these messages. It until you are gone and out of the house, and maybe not even until you get into therapy.

This is not their fault, this is the way that children learn. And it will take work and practice to unlearn these negative things about yourself. This is made harder when the society that you live in reinforces those negative beliefs.

For Black people it can be hard to not internalize the negative stereotypes that they see and hear every day, especially if those messages are reinforced in the home, the community or in the environment.

For trans and non-binary people it can be hard to not internalize the negative stereotypes that they see and hear every day, especially if those messages are reinforced in the home, the community or in the environment.

You can shift how you think about yourself. You can learn to take better care of yourself. It will likely take time and support, but it will be worth it.